lighting for macro photography is hard. so, i can't wait to get this Nikon Macro Cool-light SL-1.

***

blogzilla is greenpeace approved. now if we can only get those fuckers at PETA on our side.

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even though my name only shows up on the main page on the few entries where i mention it outright, i'm number one on google on a search for pinder. i wasn't even in the top ten a year ago. i'm probably number one now because of adding comments to other people's blogs (which i don't even do that often) where my signed name becomes a link back to this site. basically, i google-bombed myself without having to resort to an elaborate campaign! it probably wouldn't have worked if my name was david or something.

i am a unique and beautiful snowflake.

***

is the design of this site tired and old? i like this design, but i've been wondering if the site needs a new look. i seriously can't think of anything better than this. i've tried nothing and i'm all out of ideas.

a few weeks ago, i was helping out at the house construction site on the weekend. i was balancing three 16 feet long 2 x 4 pieces of lumber on my left shoulder, holding them steady with my left hand. i was facing east. but my destination was west. i couldn't just turn around, still holding the lumber on my left shouler. there's a wall on one side and a pole on the other; something about circumferences prevented it. putting the lumber down and picking it up again on my right shoulder was out of the question. what a waste of time and effort that would be.

so, i held the lumber in place and i pivoted on my foot. east. the wood went across my back. north. from my left shoulder to my right; left hand to the right. west. all in one swift motion.

i looked completely hot.

no one saw me though.

bradley nowell, lead singer of sublime, died of a heroin overdose 6 years ago yesterday, just a month before the release of their major label debut. he was 28.

till this day, whenever i'm in a record store, i find the S section and look for the sublime albums. sometimes it makes me smile when i find it in the punk section. once i even found it in the ska section at the fnac in nice, france. i wanted to protest, but i was stopped by my grade 9 grasp of the language.

one time last year, i was making my way to the tail end of the S section, but a man and a woman were already standing in the spot where the sublime albums would be. i stopped and looked over the stone roses albums in the meantime.

"i already have the self titled one and that one you've got there. maybe i should just get the greatest hits one" i heard him say.

i rarely talk to strangers, but i absolutely had to interject. i explained to him that the greatest album only has 10 songs on it, almost all of which are from the self-titled and the 40oz to freedom albums, which he already had. i took it a bit further and explained that a real sublime greatest hits album couldn't possibly fit on a single disc, let alone 10 songs. he sensed my obsession and asked about bradley's death. i gave him a brief bio of bradley and the band. the woman smiled at me. he said he was a construction worker and after a coworker kept playing sublime at a job site, he was completely hooked. i took a step forward and flipped past the acoustic set and the b-sides album and handed him robbin' the hood. there. "a masterpiece which only a true fan could appreciate", i told him. "it's a little bit different than the other albums, but trust me, you'll love it." he seemed hesistant. "besides, it's only $10, whereas the greatest hits one is $18". he agreed, thanked me and walked away with album in hand. the woman smiled at me again.

i know it sounds dumb, but that was one of my proudest moments all of last year.

but usually, i'm standing there alone. looking for that follow up album to the major label debut that never was, or ever will be. my own little silent tribute.

one of the framers working on the house smashed the eggs. fucking prick.

***

i've been to this BlindDateBlog site about 5 times now. i still have no idea what it's about.

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a Value Village thrift store burned down nearyby the other day. damage estimates could be up to $5 million, of which $4,999,920 was for the building and $80 for the merchandise.

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i linked to the wrong inifiniti g35 a few days ago. the sedan is nice, but i meant to link to the new 2003 infiniti G35 sport coupe. mmmmmm 275+ horsepower

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i downloaded the Chris Cornell / Rage Against the Machine (aka Rage Against the Garden) demos and boy do they suck. i was hoping it would feature the old "Jesus Christ Pose" or "Outshined" Cornell, but it's the later, sucky "i'll go solo" Cornell. hey Tom, please call Zach and bring back the old Rage.

a few weeks ago i was asked to tell a story, through msn messenger. i made up a story on the spot, but only got through two parts. this is part III. i wrote it in notepad one night when i couldn't sleep. i haven't edited the text since, only given it a title. it's also still written in the instant message "blocks of text" style.

***

part III - and i know you know it too

simon approaches the back door of the winnebago, looking up at the completely blackened windows. the doorknob feels warm in his hand, and as the door creeps open, a black tar like substance pours out of the camper and onto his shoes.

{ more }

goddamn you half-japanese girls, do it to me every time

god i hate the lakers. have i mentioned that before? yes i have. i usually hate teams that are bought and paid for just to win championships (ny yankees, detroit redwings, colorodo avalanche, etc...), but for some reason, the hell-ay lakers piss me off the most. thank god they lost today. and thank god shaq didn't win league MVP even though he cried and whined like a bitch when he heard he didn't win. post up and back your fat ass up into everyone smaller than you and shoot, yeah, that's real fucking talent. and what's with those burger king ads he does? you make $19.2 million a season, you don't have enough money you whore you gotta shill whoppers?

but as much as i like to make fun of shaq, i must admit, he is a good role model to all those mentally handicapped people out there. reach for those stars, cause if a tard like shaq can make it, so can you.

Update: [May 16, 2003] - Lakers are out! Derek Fischer crys like a bitch!

the family is building a new house, but it looks like another family has already moved in. i was taking pictures in the hallway on the main floor when the mother bird saw me and flew off, scaring the fuck out of me in the process. i took the nest down, snapped a few photos.

{ more }

may 16

the 5 year plan:

STP, the secret tweaker pad. a place to call my own.

infiniti G35

a puppy named Maximus, not Max.

a new city.

and maybe a cellphone.

all of which requires money. and i know of only 2 get-rich-quick schemes. they both involve porn.

pinder says: oh just admit it, you're another whore at the capitalist gangbang
jeff says: i dunno how to follow that one
jeff says: you win

before going to bed last night, i was reading about u-boats and enigma machines in Battle of Wits - The Complete Story of Codebreaking in World War II. later when i tried sleep, i was tossing and turning for about an hour. i got up and out of bed when i realized my body was in the shape of a swastika.

and if that's not fucked up enough, my bathroom floor has a swastika in the pattern. oh that designer knew exactly what he was doing, make no mistake.

***

on another note, comments are now enabled on posts if you have something to say. you have to click on the permalink to add a comment though. i stole this idea off paul. i have a right to since he owes me thousands in unpaid royalties and other ideas i have taken credit for.

you know how in some books, after being introduced to the protagonist, the author seems to just skim entire years of the character's life into one paragraph. all the things that happened in those years are summarized in about 4 sentences. and then "all of a sudden" or "before i knew it" or "the next thing i knew", something happens, and the story continues from there. and most likely, you realize in the last chapter, that something, was a pivotal moment to the rest of the story.

i've summarized 24 years in 4 sentences. and i wait for the story to continue.

check, check one, sibilance. check, check two, sibilance, sibilance.

miss me?

regularly scheduled hilarity and merriment will presume shortly.

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i don't have to sell my soul
he's already in me
--- stone roses - i wanna be adored

jesus isn't coming back
he's already inside you.
deliver yourself.
--- sam kinison